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I hit refresh and there you were with a gift for us. If I could produce something like this in a rush, I'd be very happy. I hope everything is getting better at your end, and look forward to what you were writing for fall_for_sx at a later date.

In the meantime, these are lovely snapshots of the boys. I wouldn't fret about the polish - emotions aren't polished and the depth of the emotion here is beautiful. So many lines I really liked, but these just stand out for me.

Xander's learned to tell the difference.

He tumbles into moments like this, from time to time. He's learned to recognize the feeling -- it's happiness -- and it's become familiar. Still, it floors him, every time.

He'll never stop being astonished by it: finding ecstasy in a place he'd never even dreamed of wanting.

It's how he prays

Xander gets to his feet, and closes the blinds, and this way a new day begins.

Sigh, gorgeous last line.

Thanks so much for the feedback and the well-wishes. Things are looking up today!

I'm usually an incredibly slow writer, and sit with a piece for weeks or months, editing, tinkering, not looking at it for a while and then tinkering some more. I keep having the urge to go back and edit this, which I've never done once something's been posted. I'm happy you enjoyed it, despite its flaws.

If this is written off the cuff, in a hurry, with barely a proofread, then bring on more like it! Honestly, we all understand RL issues. Do what you can, when you can, honey! RL is always going to come first, right? Having said that, then, when you have your RL stuff straightened out, hit us with the other fic! :)

RL can be a real bitch.

I'm hoping I have the time and the drive to finish the other fic, too.

Thanks for this comment -- it's very much appreciated.

Wow! That's an "emotionful" ride. Wow! I'm really feeling with Xander. Thanks for sharing this wonderful one.

I hope your family get better soon!

I'm so happy you liked it! And thank you for the good wishes. Today has been a better day.

You hope we enjoy it anyway? This is amazing! I adore it.

And I do hope the RL issues turn out well.

Happy my hopes were fulfilled!

Thanks for commenting, and RL is slowly but steadily improving.

I most definitely enjoyed this anyway *g* It may have seemed raw and unpolished but for me it was honest and showed a wonderful depth of emotion. I think a polishing would have taken something away - if that makes sense. :)

Hope RL is treating you better.

Definitely true that rewriting and editing can sometimes suck the life out of things. I'm glad you liked it in its semi-rough state.

RL improving, too. Thanks for the good wishes and the comment!

No surprise, I'm sure, to hear me say that I really liked this. I'll echo the other people above and say that I thought it was great for a piece that was quickly thrown together, even though there's room for a little polishing (but when isn't there?).

My favorite thing about this piece was the circular nature to it, which stood out to me because it was so short. Beginning with Xander talking about how relationships are compromise and showing how he's compromising, continuing on with him on his knees in front of Spike telling him (without literally telling him) how much Xander loves him. Ending with Xander thinking he's making Spike compromise too much, and that Spike will eventually leave because of it; then Spike on his knees in front of Xander telling him (without literally telling him) how much Spike loves him. That construction is just so stirring; it reaches me in a deep way.

Some choice lines: Xander's learned to tell the difference./A faint, pink hue, like the opalescent inside of a shell./ "I love you," he tells Xander. Tells him frequently, as if it's easy.

This: If he turns around before I count to fifty, Xander thinks, then he won't leave. was so poignant. How many times have I done that? How ridiculous is it to get sad when it doesn't work out, despite the fact that you made all the rules yourself? I'm glad Spike turned around in time.

Lastly, their wordless communication in the final scene, when Spike takes the time to muddle through what Xander is really trying to say. The reading between the lines. So realistic, so glad to see it.

Glad to see this from you at all; I hope the RL issues are better and things work out in the best possible way. Looking forward to seeing the story you originally intended for this, too, but I know how hectic it gets around this time, nevermind unexpected hospital trips. Best wishes for a speedy recovery!

Hi! So good to hear from you!

I'm very happy you liked it, in spite of its being pretty ragged around the edges. It's nagging at me -- everything I'd like to change, scenes I'd like to add, etc., especially the last section, which I was writing up until the moment I posted, and feels very, very rough to me.

I do like to bookend things, like the compromising, and the kneeling, so I'm really pleased you responded to that. Plus, I have a bit of a thing for kneeling -- one boy at another's feet. Particularly if it's Spike doing the kneeling. Yum.

RL has been kicking my ass, but looks to be letting up a little. Hopefully, I'll be able to get back to the fic I was working on in the next few weeks.

As always, thanks for being such a close and thoughtful reader, and for your wonderful feedback. I hope you know how much it's appreciated.

Well damn. I kinda liked this a great deal. In fact I loved it. All the above comments - ditto, all the mentioned memorable lines - ditto. The last paragraph sublime. Thankyou.

So pleased you liked it, despite its ragged edges. Thank you!

I think it is the raggedness that lends it the air of authenticity of raw emotion

Oh, how I enjoyed reading these drabbles. Wonderful.

And they did indeed fit each other very well. Lovely.

"This," he says, splaying a hand over Xander's chest, just slightly left of center. "This -- is the biggest thing that's ever happened to me."

Of course these words out of Spike's mouth with tears in his eyes and on his knees, well they nearly made me cry. Great job.

Oops! Missed this comment somehow. Thank you again. I've been very discouraged re: writing lately, and your wonderful feedback has really cheered me up about that.

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